I survived a week of Insanity.

Insanity Workout Program

I have officially gone off the deep end in my pursuit of Project Half Marathon. I mean it. Put me in a white suit, and lock me in a padded room. The workout program Insanity? Totally, completely, 100% correctly named.

Right now I am slung over the computer like a half sack of grain on a skinny man’s shoulder. I just survived my first week of Insanity, and I’m too exhausted to type let alone celebrate the fact I’m still here.

I wake up in the mornings and think, I’m glued in bed, because my muscles froze. I’m going to die of starvation with nothing but six pillows and a stuffed dog named Rooster Cogburn to keep me company.

Insanity is all about movement. Lots of cardio. Lots of plyometrics. Lots times a lot of ab-busting moves. And lots of Why the heck am I doing this?! thoughts chasing themselves around.

Additionally, Insanity is about turning into a sweat-dripping, screaming-at-the-television, collapsing-on-the-floor maniac. A startling resemblance to an entire football team after two-a-days in the late August heat.

Essentially? This is not the time to invite that boy you’ve got a crush on to come hang out.

And yet, I’m in like with the program. I seriously grumbled my way into the start of it this morning. Likely something to do with the four pop-tarts I had for breakfast. Don’t do that. Be a better woman than me, and hold it to three.

But I’m never sorry I worked out. Think about it, how many things are there in life that you’ll never regret doing? Exercise is one of them.

I didn’t start the Insanity workout program because I wanted to look good playing sand volleyball this summer. Although that would be nice now that I think about it. If I played sand volleyball. Which I don’t, so scratch that.

This is Project Half Marathon in motion. I live in north Idaho, and I choose not to have a gym membership or massacre my lungs by running outside during the winter. In order to stack on the miles this spring, I needed something to help get me in shape.

Insanity was the obvious choice, because a friend was willing to lend it to me. AKA: free! However, I now have suspicions that he is having a good chuckle over what I’m going through. It should whip me into some semblance of fitness that allows me to hit the ground running in March though, and that’s what I wanted.

I’m not an Insanity junkie. Not yet. But I fear I’m dangerously close to busting out my Buzz Lightyear voice, raising my fist and shouting, β€œTo Insanity…and beyond!”

* Hey y’all, let the record show I’m not endorsing Insanity. I’m not reviewing it. I’m not getting paid or being given a tiny little statue or a feed truck full of pop-tarts. I just wanted to share my experience with this exercise program and rejoice in the fact it hasn’t killed me. Yet.


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